Solacegirl

Last night was one of those worship leading experiences that leaves you wondering, “How in the world was I allowed to sit behind that piano and lead these ladies in worship?”  It wasn’t a complete train wreck but it had a moment where I thought I was out of my body watching my hands all of a sudden switch to a completely different key.  My biggest fear is that my leading would be a distraction instead of an attraction.  This group is very forgiving, and honestly they don’t need anyone to do anything except start the song.  They love to sing songs of praise.  Thankfully we were able to end it on a good note.

There is a danger when you sit down to lead and your heart and mind are not in the moment.  In that situation I lose concentration quickly if I don’t keep things in check.  I had been distracted by my thoughts of my family.  Changes in school for the oldest, the start of school for the youngest, missing my family back in the Pac NW, family hurting physically and emotionally all cascaded at one time.  One would think that at my age it would be easy to put away those thoughts into a neat compartment only to be opened when I wished it.  I’m finding that’s not the case.  I’m created a certain way, and it’s my job to make sure that I take every thought captive, keep my mind in the right place so that I find peace.  I guess it’s a constant thing.  It’s not something that I can just snap and change about myself.

So, how do I prevent this from happening again?  Take a few moments to myself before I have to step out on the platform.  That five minute countdown should be used to breathe and pray.  Easy fix.